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On a mission to discover myself more as a pony. <3 Ultimate goal: seamless immersion.

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AstralAmity

Week 1

I was meaning to post on yesterday, but I was playing Skyrim VR all day. >.< I suppose I should start with the effects I've felt over the week.

It's gotten normal for my hands to go numb (and difficult to move my fingers unless I "switch" out of my hooves) in the hypnosis files, but as the days passed this week I started to feel my whole body feeling a similar thing too. It's almost as though my body wasn't sending quite as many signals, but it wasn't quite completely numb. I had a sense of where my pony body was, and had a vague sense of sensory input from it. The first few days was a bit messy in terms of details, but now it's starting to get a bit more accurate in terms of the form that I am taking. The brush in the new pegasus file was amazing in shaping my tail and mane! Before that file, I was having difficulty visualizing my tail correctly.

A few times, the colors of my coat and mane was off, but I'm wondering if that is based on my previous files a year or so ago (at one point I was Rainbow Dash, for instance). By Sunday morning, though, I was able to immerse myself enough to have a sense of my pony body's weight and even vaguely feel my wings if I concentrate. Same goes with the ears, there. I could use a bit more practice in making the sensations more noticeable. Oh! And also, on Friday while I was at work and there wasn't much to do, Vinyl (my tulpa) was really active. We spent pretty much the whole day together. ^^

I've also been searching inside myself, and I think I communicated with a part of myself which had been damaged and the root of many of my issues from a few years ago. This part of myself took the form of my old OC, as I pretty much... split myself, years ago. It was one of my mistakes, but I've been coming to terms with myself this past year so things have been getting better. I'm finally giving this part of myself some love and empathy, rather than shunning myself away. Interesting now that this part of myself is taking a mental form of my old pegasus OC... the one that was more shy. When conversing with this part of me (much like how I talk with a tulpa, but still definitely different), I wondered afterwards if this is a part of my "true" pegasus self... I've already changed my form so many times, I guess I just want stability as Astral Amity, but I can't shake off the feeling that this is still a part of me. Maybe I can still  take the form of Astral, but minor changes might occur with me as I come to terms more with myself.

This was a lengthy post. :v Anyway, to sum it up, I am getting closer to my first goal of focusing on my pony form consistently, though I do still need work. Making sure I am not too tired before hypnosis as well as not playing any videogames right before. That way I can have focused visuals coming in that are not influenced by much else.

Until next week.

AstralAmity

Hi everypony!

For those who don't know me, I'm Astral. I've gone by multiple names/forms in the past (such as Techoh), but after all these years I think I finally found myself... It took me long enough to finally get back in touch with the community, but I'm back. So much in my life has changed, but I still see myself as a pony even after all this time.

To preface, I have a few years experience with the hypno-files as well as tulpas. My background is both in the realm of science and metaphysics. I bring to the table neuro/psychological knowledge, energy/aura manipulation, and other relevant topics throughout this journal. Other experience in my life is programming and developing myself towards working with Brain-Computer Interfaces.

That all aside... My goal, it's simple. Enhance my experience in my pony form! ^^ Ultimately, my goal is to have seamless immersion while remaining in balance with my human life. I’ll be very honest here, I neglected my human body and even took an unhealthy approach years ago (it's a long story I'd rather not go into, but it relates to earlier life trauma). Now though, my mind is now in the best shape it's been since… ever. This is in due because of my personal life moving forward. I want to give it my all, to improve my visualization and imposition skills as well as learn more about myself. My partner that I live with (literally we sleep in the same bed) is another motivation, as I love the feeling of being with her especially while I'm in my pony form. Her profile name is Silver-Ember and she is my cutie pie. <3 Ultimately, though, I am becoming more whole with my pony form for my own reasons. That way I remain consistent in my training as well as enhance my experience.

I do feel excited, because this time I want to plan specific goals that I plan to reach as I document my training. Here are the main goals I am starting out with.

       1 - During each hypnosis/meditation, consistently maintain at least 90% - 95% focus on my pony form and/or other relevant pony experiences during the files.

       2 - With aid of triggers, incorporate pony form through imposition so as it feels natural and effortless.

       3 - Increase sensory detail in both mindscape and imposition. Reach at least ghost/phantom sensations.

Aaaand, the ultimate goal in which all my smaller goals reach to:

       - Full immersion as my pony self.

The way I am going to go about achieving these goals is by listening to the generic pegasus file every night possible, alongside supplement hypnosis while riding on the long bus ride to work in the morning. While walking from the bus to work, I will try to maintain my pony form (as walking is very relaxing to me with the cool morning temperature). When I get to work, luckily I don't face many people as I am just programming on my computer. Then I'll head back home, either practicing visualizing or just reading a book (depending on how I feel). After that, repeat onward to the next night.

To finish this intro off, here are pictures of my OC! These are rather old, and I need to get some commissioned… but I hope it gives an idea of who I am. I want some pictures that bring out more of my OC’s feminine side. ^^’
 

astral_anahata_amity_by_astralamity-dao3

everything_is_gonna_be_alright_by_astral

The pony to the right in the second picture is Silver-Ember's OC. <3 

Anyway, thank you if you happen to take an interest in this journal. ^^' I'll be writing every Sunday, for my own benefit in keeping a catalog of my progress towards achieving my goals in this endeavor.

 

Infinite Love,

Astral Amity

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